


Between love or duty

by JuliaDaviesMcdonaldFraser



Category: Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fergus is adopted for Jaime and claire in the legal form, Not revolution Jacobite yet, The name of Brianna is Ellen Julia Fraser, jaime and Claire have a son before Faith and Brianna
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-27
Updated: 2017-11-08
Packaged: 2019-01-23 18:57:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,127
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12514184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JuliaDaviesMcdonaldFraser/pseuds/JuliaDaviesMcdonaldFraser
Summary: AU There is no revolution Jacobite yet- When Clarie returns to the twentieth century after Jaime forced her to cross again through the stones of Craigh Na Dun after saving her from the Inquisition. And she discovers herself pregnant with her son, plus several secrets from her own past. Everything changes.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you like it this is my first fic of outlander and please comment or leave me Kudos English isn't my first league so any mistake let me know also if someone could recommend me a beta reader I would appreciate it.  
> the story is mine and stay in Fanfiction and wattpad in spanish in diferent's account's

Scotland October 20, 1718

Callanish Stones - Island of Lewis

"Run Julia, Run, you can." - Andrew told me * while urging me to continue up the hill without letting go of my hand, while my left arm rested our daughter or as he liked to call her "mo nighean donn" * who was born just five days.

I was so absorbed in escaping from the English patrol that I almost didn't realize where we were, and had it not been for the lack of vegetation and the enormous size of the stones that adorned the landscape, perhaps I would never have done so.

It was for this reason that I stopped in front of the stone that crowned the center of that circle and looking at it, I asked in amazement:

\- What do you think you're doing? - to which he replied with a firm tone:

"Save your life, you said it yourself, woman, difficult times will come for all in Scotland, even clans, not all may be saved, but as long as you are safe in your time I will know that no matter what happens in the end, my sacrifice it will have been worth it because you and our "nighean" will be fine.

Then I said with a pained heart at the same time that I tried to calm the baby, who, as if he understood our words, was only craing with all his might:  
"You can't force me, there's nothing for me there, not anymore. Besides, Clarie needs you, I'm your wife and I need you, I love you. - when he heard me say that, looking me in the eyes, he told me to kiss me with contained passion, forcing me closer to the stone in front of us, after which my right hand was placed behind my guiding hand towards the surface of the stone:

\- I love you too, never forget it, it does not matter if you're with Henry. Now promise me that you will take care of her and never forget the clan motto: "My hope is constant in you." *  
When I wanted to turn my head to look at him, I felt the unmistakable sensation of falling into the void as invisible threads pulled at me and I could not help but close my eyes from the impression.

When I felt that the sensation had passed I slowly opened my eyes to find myself alone or at least that I believed at first, more when the ceaseless cry of a baby made its way in my field of hearing I ran towards its origin as if my life depended of it.

Arriving and after glimpsing my daughter who lay on a piece of plaid weeping desperate, the only thing I tried to do to calm her, and perhaps also a little to myself, was to kneel beside her and take her in my arms imprisoning her tightly against my chest, saying softly to her ear, repressing the tears that were struggling to escape my eyes:

-Shh, my baby don´t cry anymore, Mom is here and she's always going to be here.  
Glossary:

Andrew: I refer to Andrew MacDonald of the Clanranald appearing in episode number ten of the series by dueling with the Duke of Sandringham for a gambling debt in which Jaime Fraser is the Duke's "Godfather of Duel.

"mo nighean donn": means my dark haired girl in Gaelic.

"nighean" means girl in Gaelic.

"My hope is constant in you": it is the motto of the clan of Andrew.

Historic note:

The Fraser clan of Lovat and the MacDonald clan of Clanranald were rival clans.


	2. The return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> english isn't my first language any mistake let me know if you could recommend me a beta reader would appreciate it thank you leave me kudos or comments

* * *

How do you think life develops? There are a series of coincidences and events that have to occur in some way. Do you think that our lives collide and intertwine without order or agreement? If there were no reason, what would it all do? Why do you think things happen? (Cecelia Ahern)

* * *

 

Scotland mid November 1946

Craigh Na Dunn- near Inverness

My head was throbbing and everything was spinning, when I felt good enough to stop an unpleasant sensation was present in the mouth of my stomach and I staggered running to the first shrub that I found saying goodbye lunch and surely part of the last breakfast that I shared with Jamie.

It was at that moment that, looking at the disaster in the grass a sense of inexplicable sadness took over me forcing me to look desperately for the copper ring that he gave me when we got married. Finding it on my finger was a balm for my heart because, although I was certain about the landscape of the paved road that I could see in the distance that I was no longer in the eighteenth century, knowing it in my hand gave me the certainty that everything that happened had been real and not just a product of my mind. Even so, I can't avoid crying because the time spent with him had made me understand that I loved him and the mere fact of knowing me apart from his side filled my heart with pain.

So immersed was I in my thoughts that I barely noticed as a woman's voice said surprised behind my back:

\- Mrs. Randall, are you? - to which turning on myself I said surprised:

"Mrs. Graham, and I would have continued talking about not being because everything around me began to spin and I fell prey to a fading.

When I could reopen my eyes, a bright light cut me off, forcing me to cover my eyes with one hand and it was at that moment that a woman in a robe, surely a nurse told me:

-Lady that good that woke up, we were very worried when Mrs. Graham brought her, after all, you don´t always see again people who disappear like you, usually.

After that I asked him something confused:

-Excuse me, but, I would like to know Where am I and who are you? if it's not a lot of clear trouble.

At this the woman told me in dismay:

Oh how clumsy of me not to have said or presented properly. Mrs. Randall, is the general hospital of Inverness I'm Isobel Campbell and I´m your nurse in charge, now if you allow me to proceed to extract a little blood is a routine check to rule out any disease - after which I answered nodding:

-Of course, go on- that's how I got a syringe and extracted some blood from my right arm. Once finished the process left the room without first informing me that I would have the result in two hours and telling me to eat the apple to which I agreed to try it and I must admit that after several hours without eating the little fruit I knew to glory and once I finished it, inexplicably I couldn't help falling prey to the dream again.

* * *

After leaving Clarie to cross the stones again and after my night of vigil I mounted Donas again and left for Leoch.

I don't know how much time I spent in the way prisoner of my thoughts, the only thing I could remember were Clarie's please for me not to leave her and her voice calling me again and again.

I really loved that woman, now I knew it and the mere fact of understanding that at that very moment I was once unattainable and impassable far from me, my existence filled me with pain and maybe if it were not for knowing that she would be in the company of another man who deserved it more than me and that my only presence at that unknown time would only cause a bad third between them would retrace my steps and cross those stones without hesitation.

But whoever I wanted to cheat, she had Frank there would be no room for me at that time.

When I arrived at the castle Murtagh and Mrs. Fitz came out to meet me and once I got off my horse he asked me bluntly:

\- Where is your wife? - to which I responded resigned while watching as the woman beside him covered his mouth horrified:

-She has left.

Then it was that she crossed herself proclaiming:

\- I never would have believed that girl, she seemed so good poor boy that the Lord had prepared you cruel destiny.

To which I said bluntly:

-She is not a witch.

Then she said looking at me with a sad face:

-My poor Jamie you don´t know what you say she has bewitched you, if that has to be, Laoghaire herself told me and how she had to testify as she did in the trial.

When I heard that I could not believe it, not about that girl, but thinking about it that explained why it had been so cold with Clarie since I had returned as my wife. She was jealous, no doubt as my godfather used to say she would never stop being a girl at least, until she turned fifty. I really felt sorry for the poor man who played for her husband.

Even so, I couldn't help but say angrily:

\- What did she do?! - and I kept talking about not being because at that moment my sponsor told me:

-Keep your energies boy, Colum awaits you in his study now.

* * *

When I woke up from my second nap of the day I came across the pleasant vision of Mrs. Graham who was keeping company with me and when she saw me I asked:

\- How are you girl? You've been sleeping all afternoon, I didn't want to wake you seemed so peaceful. - It was then when observing the night landscape through the window in the hospital room I said surprised:

-I'm fine thanks, however, I have never slept so much even in my best days.

after all, I didn't lie, neither in my days with Uncle Lamb with the life we had in precarious conditions, nor with Jamie except inexplicably in the last weeks by his side, I had slept so soundly. Therefore, my new bodily behavior seemed completely extraordinary to me.

Then it was that trying to move my right arm I felt a discomfort that scared me, after all, I had no knowledge that when crossing the stones I was hurt in some way and seeing the catheter connected to my body I am extremely alarmed so, surprised looking at my benefactor said trying to make me understand while pointing with my head the device attached to my body where a liquid translucent slowly passed:

-What does this mean?

That's how Mrs. Graham told me with the same astonishing calmness as one who comments on the climate leaving me stunned:

-They are vitamins, they said you needed them, you know, for the baby.

When I heard that more instinctively than consents I took my free hand to my still flat belly without being able to give credit to what she had said, after all that was impossible because during the months that Frank had been interested in his family genealogy he and I had set a goal "To dominate the next branch of the Randall family." * However, during that time we had tried unsuccessfully to get pregnant and now a moment here was here, in the twentieth century and pregnant and maybe If I hadn't spent time in another era as I knew I wouldn't have interrogated the Reverend's assistant in such a desperate way trying to dispel a growing doubt in my head as I did then by saying:

\- How long ... do you have any idea, ma'am, of how long I've been pregnant?

Then it was that she looking at me surprised said:

-Didn't you know, according to what Dr. O Donell estimates will not be more than two weeks.

That's how I broke down on myself and with tears in my eyes while touching my lap I said to myself in a weak and barely audible voice trying not to be heard:

\- Oh my God, it's jamie, mine and Jamie's ...

At that moment it was that after hearing my words my companion said curious:

\- Who is Jamie?

and in that moment, when I was discovered and maybe because I wanted to vent on someone, I understood that, if my assumptions about her were true, the most probable thing is that that woman was one of the few people capable of understanding what happened to me.

-It is a long story. - to which she left her place at the foot of the bed while taking the chair and approached me next to sit down told me while almost imperceptibly winking her left eye and then take my hand maternally:

-Don't worry we have enough time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Explains notes:
> 
> "Mastering the next branch of the Randall family": I allude to a comment Clarie made while she was with Frank in his Bed and Breakfast room in the first chapter of the series.
> 
> The illustration of this chapter is an image of the real castle that belonged to the laird of the Mckenzie clan until the end of the 19th century, the real castle Leoch, which in reality is named after the castle Leod


End file.
